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Acceptance: The Hardest First Step
Why The Hell Is It So Hard!
Jay Longden
June 07, 2025
Jay’s 2 Cent’s
It should really be the easiest thing in the world for us to do. We have absolutely no choice in the matter. There is not a single thing we can do to change it. And yet it cripples most of us mentally, emotionally and sometimes physically. When you look at it logically and metaphorically you would think that only a complete lunatic, someone devoid of all reasoning would not be able to understand the simplicity of it.
I have broken a few bones and had a few illness’s over the space of my life. The xray photo is of when I broke my humerus landing very hard in my hang glider. I can still remember trying to get my arm out from under the A frame of the glider and the way the skin was twisting around my arm I knew that somthing was not right.
It was the second last day of the Canungra Classic, A hang gliding competition in South East Qld Australia. One of the hardest things to do when things go really wrong is accepting that it has happened so you can move on to the next phase and find solutions and way’s in which you won’t make the same mistake again.
For example: Have you ever been in a supermarket/mall, one of those ones where you get your weeks’ worth of steps in one day, walking from one end to the other? Well, I imagine that when you went for the first time and you were looking for a particular shop you used one of those info board map thingy’s. You type in the shop you are looking for and then it produces a map with a big flashing “YOURE HERE” symbol and a dotted path with arrows showing you where to go.
Now imagine if you decided to disagree with the info board and believed that you were not “Here”, but actually, you were somewhere else. How are you going to find your way to the shop because now the path to get there, according to you, will be vastly different because you are not where you actually are but somewhere else.
You then spend your life living in a fantasy world believing that you are at one place trying to get to another place when the place you are actually in is always there and can never go anywhere, because it is the present moment. Man that hurts the head!
Why have we become so disillusioned in our thinking?
I believe it starts when we are children and then continues until we become awake and aware to what is going on. Everything these day’s is about being perfect and never making mistakes. The need to be liked, to be successful (which is how much money you have, and how much stuff you own) has become so overwhelming that people now find it almost impossible to want to accept their present moment.
They become fixated with living in the future working towards there happiness or looking back in the past at how happy they were. It would be like waiting to be happy until the final episode of Game Of Thrones gets released. What if it never came?
I have a revelation for you…….
Happiness is accepting that the present moment is all you have.
Happiness is accepting that every single action, thought, word spoken has led you to this moment right now.
Happiness is accepting that you are a miracle of the universe right now at this present moment.
Happiness is accepting all the amazing attributes you have and to be grateful for right now in this present moment.
Happiness is the breath that is presently coming into your lungs giving you life so that you can smile and brighten up another sentient being’s present moment.
Therefore happiness only exists in the present moment. There is nothing to accept about this, it simply is.
I have spent so many present moments wishing I was some where else. They were not wasted moments as all of them led me to be in this one right now sitting here writing. I only found peace and freedom though when I learned the true meaning of acceptance and how empowering that truth is.
Take a deep breath in….. Breathe out and look around you…. being truthful about where you are, who you are and what you are in this present moment will allow you to create a clear path on where you want to go.
The power is now yours! No more labels, no more blaming anyone else, no more excuses, no more “One day’s”.
I believe in you and the miracle that you are!
Jay
The next night after the accident. Somehow managed to still win Sports class for the comp!
Acceptance
It’s a word we often hear in personal growth circles, but one that’s deeply misunderstood. For many, acceptance feels like giving up, or worse — condoning what’s gone wrong in our lives.
But true acceptance isn’t about surrendering to defeat — it’s about reclaiming our power.
It is the hardest, yet most liberating first step we can take on the path to personal freedom.
🌱 What Is Acceptance?
Acceptance is the conscious acknowledgment of reality — exactly as it is, not how we wish it to be.
It means seeing the truth of our current circumstances without denial, blame, or judgment.
Acceptance doesn’t mean we like where we are, or that we want to stay here. It simply means we recognize the moment we’re in — fully and without resistance.
It includes accepting:
Our past decisions
The consequences of those choices
The behavior of others (without approving of it)
And most importantly, the role we’ve played in arriving at our present moment
🧭 Why Acceptance Matters
We can’t change what we don’t acknowledge. When we resist reality, we stay stuck — emotionally, mentally, and physically.
Whether we’re facing:
A broken relationship
Financial hardship
Health challenges
Or inner regret
Until we accept the truth of where we are, we cannot move forward.
Acceptance creates space. It allows us to:
Stop fighting the past
Break cycles of blame and shame
Reclaim power over our choices
Start moving toward healing and growth
🔥 The Challenges of Acceptance
Let’s be honest — acceptance is tough.
It means dropping the stories and facing the truth. It means looking in the mirror with compassion, not excuses.
Some of the hardest parts include:
Ego resistance — Our ego wants to avoid pain, and often denies our role in our situation.
Fear of responsibility — Owning our part means accepting we now have the power (and duty) to change.
Emotional discomfort — Grief, guilt, sadness, and regret may surface.
Letting go — We may have to release people, dreams, or narratives that no longer serve us.
And yet, this is the path to freedom.
🌈 The Benefits of Acceptance
Once we truly accept our present situation, something remarkable happens: peace begins to settle in.
We are no longer fighting a war with ourselves or the world around us.
✅ Emotional Benefits:
Emotional relief and stability
Greater self-compassion
Stronger resilience in the face of stress
✅ Mental Benefits:
Improved focus and decision-making
Freedom from repetitive thought loops
Clarity on what truly matters
✅ Physical Benefits:
Reduced stress and anxiety
Better sleep and immune function
Increased overall energy and vitality
Acceptance realigns your mind, body, and spirit — and that’s where transformation begins.
🚀 What Happens After Acceptance?
Once we’ve accepted where we are, we are finally free to begin the process of change.
Acceptance opens the door to:
Setting realistic, purposeful goals
Creating healthier habits and boundaries
Taking empowered, conscious action
Healing emotional wounds without denial
Remember: You can’t move forward from a place you pretend not to be in.
🧘 How to Practice Acceptance
Acceptance is not a “one and done” event — it’s a daily practice. A quiet commitment to seeing life clearly and treating ourselves with kindness.
Here’s how to begin:
Pause and Reflect
Ask: What is true right now? What am I avoiding or resisting?
Feel the Feelings
Allow guilt, sadness, regret, or anger to rise — don’t push them away. Name them. Witness them.
Release Blame
Blame locks us into victimhood. Acceptance invites us into empowerment.
Choose Self-Compassion
Remind yourself: I did the best I could with what I knew then. Now I know better.
Ground Yourself in the Present
This moment is the only place you have power. Take one small, conscious step forward.
💬 Final Thoughts
Acceptance is hard. But it is also beautiful.
It’s not weakness — it’s strength.
It’s not giving up — it’s gearing up.
It’s not the end — it’s the beginning.
💡 Acceptance means that you are ok with your present moment because it is the only moment you can do anything about and knowing this gives you the power to start!
And that… is the first true step toward freedom.
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